Fauxlosophy

Answer me this:

If one is already at the destination, why make the journy? If you have all the answers, why ask questions?

Why not?

Every journey is a journey worth of experience, every step brings you a step further into the future. (XKCD) Hey, want to come to the future with me? THat canoe goes to the future? Yeah, just like everything else, now hop in and lets go! (paraphased)

PS: Just so this is not completely serious: I have no ice cream. I give you my ice cream. How does this work?
(and can anyone guess what kind of philosophical metaphor this is?)

Jack is riding his car from his home to the martini bar at 80 mph, his home is seven miles away from the bar. Jake is going to the same place, but at 30mph and is three miles far. Who gets there first?

But why all the riddles? I mean why is Jack riding so fast? Why does he need to get to the bar so much? Why the smug attitude of Jake? Who is hiding what?

This is an answer only Private Eye can answer...

It's an ice-cream koan!

PI: Who is this Jack? Why is he going over 80 in the middle of a city? And this Jake character seems pretty suspicious, driving so slow!
Theoretical physicist: How can you tell their velocity if you know where they are?
Calvin: I knew only one number could be big enough to keep this big-mouthed canary from singing, and that had to be the number they call Mr. Billion...